Love VS. Lust & the Consequences of a Toxic Relationship

 

By: Anielle

 

Looking at the snow covered lawns of Skokie, Illinois in January 2018, the average person would have thoughts of hot cocoa with the slight aftertaste of Christmas in the air. Me and my boyfriend at the time were like most couples, cozied up on the couch to escape the cold. A scene so normal you would never expect the day to end with both him and I being arrested, and both of our lives being changed for the worse.

 

It had been a seemingly normal day. Him and I were bored, and he suggested, oh so casually, that we could “finesse” someone. Now to all the naive young people reading this, loving someone does not mean doing whatever they want. Especially not harmful things. I know now that if we had truly been in love, we would have strived for each other to be better, safe people. But sadly, this was not the case.

 

Our plan was an impulsive, insane mess. The victim someone I had known for years. During the robbery, the victim was hit in the leg with a metal pipe, not causing injury, but causing our little “finesse” to go from robbery to a whole other extreme. Armed robbery.

 

Only a few hours later, me and him were sitting at my house when the police showed up. I will never forget the feeling of those cold, shiny handcuffs and the look on my dad’s face as I was put into the back of a cop car, all for the first time in my life.

 

10 months later, I’m still fighting for my freedom, and my ex lost his. Being in Juvie, being placed on house arrest, and for what? For a boy who whole time had another girlfriend I didn’t know about. He never loved me. I confused lust for love because I wanted to be loved.

 

For me, winter never ended. Although I am slowly feeling the warmth of the sun on my cheeks, my frostbite is everlasting. I walk differently, talk differently, I am different. What may confuse some, is that even though my life has changed for the worse, I, as a human being, have changed for the better.